This is why I can't have nice things!

[The following post has been deemed indecent and has been edited accordingly. The owner of this blog has been fined $3.7 million cajllion dollars for the infractions. –The FCC]

I went to a farm yesterday. G**, it was so much fun! First, therooster woke us up with his famous “C***-A-Doodle-D**” line. Then, me and my relatives went to feed the pigs. I watched the hogs s**** down their food. However, the baby pigs were so cute. The m***** sat there as the piglets s***ed on her t****s. G*t d***, I was tired as h*** though. After we fed the chickens, our time c**e to eat. I s**k my t**th into the food my cousin cooked up. We had b****, eggs, cornb****, some orange ju***, topped off with a big bowl of *******. Then we check out the b*lls and the cows. I got the chance to actually see real, honest to g***ness b***s***! It stanks like a m*****f****r! After that, we **** ** ******* ***** ****. The ***** was all messed up and we couldn’t ****, ****, or anything of the sort. C****** ******** **** ******* ** **** * *** *** *** plow. *****g **** ***y** j**** d**** Uncle Joe **** ***! Y** **** **** ** *** **l***f k**** lo*** door. A** in a**, * *** **f *** h*** r* h***u** j*** i* c**s o***. *** ***f*** ***ee** h***? The e**.